Fact: I NEVER would have survived this long if it weren't for the love and support of not JUST my friends but also the strangers in support groups, exercise classes, online groups, etc. that would eventually become my friends, or in the least, supportive cheerleaders!
I know that it has been awhile since my last post. Things got VERY hectic here and it became very stressful for me trying to post about the past while trying to live in the present. So...I've decided to chuck the past. I'll get to it if it pops up. I'm going to focus on the here and now.
So...the here and now. I am now down 85 pounds since surgery on January 2nd. My 9 month "Surgiversary", if you will, was on Oct. 2nd. I would have NEVER gotten this far were it not for the people who have helped uplift and push me along.
I have had a lot of pitfalls. The largest being that I haven't lost a single ounce since 19 weeks. That's NO weight loss in 17 weeks. It's so disheartening. Especially when looking on all of the message boards I'm on seeing all these people losing 100's of pounds and only a few months out. It's worse when you see them boast about "OMG, I'm not even exercising!" or "I eat what I want" or "I'm not even TRYING!" I am trying SOOO hard. I worked out constantly (before moving to Ohio a month ago) and nothing was happening.
I took this question as well as an annoyingly detailed food diary to both my doctor and my nutritionist. I've taken blood tests to check for hormone imbalances, thyroid problems, etc. The consensus. They have NO clue what's going on. I get the "Maybe your body is just done". Uh. NO! My body is NOT done losing after only 19 weeks. I refuse to let that be the case.
I am happy to say that my health is OUTSTANDING! I no longer have diabetes, I'm the only patient my sleep apnea doctor said he's EVER seen beat sleep apnea (especially with just HOW bad mine was), my cholesterol is normal, my blood pressure...well I'm still on meds for that, but I'm a stressed individual LOL. I feel better physically and mentally. I can move, I can keep up with my kids, my life is happier! I'm just terrified that these things will come back since I'm still SOOO close to my start.
With all of this weighing on me it's been my friends who have been there to support and love me. Everyday I look up and see amazingly supportive love notes from my "wife" Jori who posted them secretly when I was just starting my pre-op liquid diet. Her notes inspire me when I want to give up.
Then there is Stacy. She's a gal who is a veteran sleever and I was so blessed to meet her. She's there to tell me to shut up, to measure my ass to show me "hey you may not have lost weight, but look! You've lost inches" or when none of that is happening, she has a new idea to show me how far I've come despite being stuck. She's there to drag to exercise classes and keep me moving and laughing.
Mindy, another sleeve gal who was a few months after me is always there to trade ideas, do crazy things like the pouch test, keep uplifting and pushing, and inspiring.
My husband has always been my biggest cheerleader. Totally against me having this surgery in the beginning has never stopped him from supporting me, loving me, and giving me the boost I need now and again. Even if it's a harsh reminder or a kind word.
My support groups both online and in person are there to vent to, learn new ideas from, and in general find a mind that can understand your battle. Sometimes they can be something that brings you down, but when it's really necessary, they are truly there to lift you up. I even ended up starting my own (because some are just WAAAY to out there and drama ridden that I had to leave) If you are a bariatric patient you are welcome to join us there!! You can find us on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/groups/660538027375408/ under the name "Sleeving Stars". In person support groups have proved to be the same way...both way over dramatic with annoying people, but also SOOO supportive, uplifting, and a place to keep your brain moving on the right track.
The last group that has kept me moving (and this one, literally!) is all the amazing fitness instructors who have helped kick my ass and help raise my spirits and moved into a group far beyond "fitness instructor" and into "Friend" Tashia, Sacchia, Jamie, and the staff and Iluminate24 in Harker Hts., TX. Walking into my gym and being known by name, their inquires of my well being, their smiles, and especially there "WHERE WERE YOU?!?! Why weren't you at class" really kept me moving! Albeit in a very guilt tripped fashion ;) It's exactly what I need when I'm feeling run down and beat...1 little facebook message to remind me "HEY! Class tonight! You better be there!" put me in a mood to get moving again.
Now I'm here in Ohio and far from all these people who have made this journey successful for me. Now I'm starting over. Now I'm on my own (they are absolutely still here for me in spirit, but now it's me and up to me) I have found a new gym. But still need more motivation to go. I'm eating right...but I've still gained 5 pounds. To cure this, I've signed up for The BadAss Dash. It's a 5k obstacle course that's this weekend. I'm starting to find my team here. A friend from High School has agreed to be there with me and help push me forward and not be scared on my own. They have Team Amy started in Texas and are cheering me on from afar. Next week I start training again, like I should be. I will start finding support groups again. I will not let myself fail.
No one can make this journey alone. If you are pre-op, start building your team now, if you are post off and feel like your floundering, find your team and reach out! This is so much more than just slicing out part of your stomach, eating differently, and exercising. There is so much that goes into the mental factor of it. You have to have love, support, and understanding from those around you. There are going to be days when its time to have that disgusting protein drink and you just can't. That's the day you are going to need people to give you a new recipe, a new idea about how to drink them, or just to tell you "Big girl panty time! Head back, chug!"
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You amazing people in my life are more the reason I have lost 85 pounds than any else! You are in my heart so dearly.
